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How to Overcome Your Fear of Social Selling

October 11, 2021

Are You Stuck In Selling Paralysis?

If the thought of selling your coaching program has you paralyzed, I get it. Most of us have at least one experience of being sold to that felt awful.  Now as entrepreneurs and social sellers ourselves, that memory creeps into our minds and makes us second guess ourselves.  So instead of showing up and selling, we’re left creating more and more content hoping that our people will magically just come to us.

When It Comes to Selling, Does This Sound Familiar?

I don’t know about you but I started my coaching business because I had a passion for helping people. I didn’t have a background in sales. Nor did I ever want to be in sales. And the thought of being a saleswoman just made me cringe.

I’m sure you can relate. Most of the women I work with love helping people and they know they’re here to make a big impact.  But as soon as the idea of sales pops in their heads, they immediately shut down.

How You Think About Sales and Why

Let’s unpack your fears and help you think of sales in a different way.  Then you can get out there, share your valuable work, and make the impact you’re here to make. Because let’s be honest, you know you were meant for this.

What comes to mind when you think of selling?

Most of us who are jumping into sales for the first time think selling is slimy and sleazy.  The idea of selling brings to mind the car salesmen of the 1980’s or the door to door salesmen of your childhood.

Online sales today are no better. If you’re marketing online you likely have had your fill of “Hey, girl” DM’s.  You know the messages I’m talking about. They’re from people you’ve never interacted with and there’s no personalization or connection. Or they’re from someone you’ve recently connected with but they go straight into the sale without getting to know you at all.

So when the idea of selling is brought up, these types of experiences usually come to mind first. We often think of someone who’s pushy, shady, and just out to get the sale, no matter what it takes.

If this is what comes to mind for you when you think of sales, it’s no wonder you’re paralyzed when it comes to selling your offer.  But when you’re not selling your offer, it’s impossible to build the kind of business you really want to have.

What If You Thought of Selling As Serving and Helping People?

So let’s be the change we want to see when it comes to sales. First of all, selling doesn’t have to be sleazy or slimy.  I like to think of selling as serving.  If I begin with the intention of building a relationship and connecting with other valuable humans without any agenda, my energy shifts into being of service.  This is exactly where I want to be. When I’m in this energy, I don’t have any expectations. I don’t have an agenda.  I’m building real relationships with real people.  So then I can be a real human and stop being so weird. If you notice that you start to feel weird and awkward, you’ve slipped out of service.  To recenter yourself, go back to your intentions.  Remember that you’re building relationships and helping people.

4 Steps to Help You Change Your Thoughts About Selling

Here are 4 simple steps to help you change your relationship with selling so you can get out there and help more people.

1. Begin by building trust. 

Building trust actually begins with your niche and content. Start by doing the work to get really clear about who your ideal client is. Talk with people who are your ideal client to learn more about what they’re struggling with and what they want. When you have a clear understanding of what their problem is you can create content to address their specific problem. This is the first step in selling.  You’re selling through your content.  Show up consistently and speak directly to your ideal client and their problem.  This is how you begin to build trust and authority.

2. Create an offer that solves the problem your ideal client has.

When you create an offer that solves your ideal client’s problem, you’re coming from a place of service.  First, you want to do the work of connecting with your ideal client and getting really clear on what they’re struggling with. Then you can craft an offer that is personalized just for them.  Remember, your clients don’t want coaching, they want the result you’re promising.  When you create your offer with this in mind, your offer will be focused on helping your ideal client solve their problem.

3. Believe in your offer and what you’re selling, and know that it helps people get the result they want.

When you create your offer, notice your thoughts about it.

Do you believe it will help your ideal client?

Do you believe that your ideal client will get the results you promise after working with you?

Do you believe that your offer is exactly what your ideal client needs?

Make sure you can answer yes to all of those.  If you can’t, ask yourself why not and consider what you need to do to shift your beliefs.

Do you need to make some changes to your offer?

Do you need to work on your belief about yourself, your offer, or your client when it comes to this offer?

How could you shift your thinking so that your belief in your offer creates the confidence you need to get out there and share it with the world?

4. Create opportunities for engagement.

There are many strategies for engaging with your ideal client.  There is no perfect cookie cutter solution that will work for every person. You get to decide how you want to engage with your community in a way that feels good to you. 

One way to do this with your own online community is to share a story and create a poll.  This allows you to get to know your community better and show up and serve them really well. You could share a personal story and then ask them if they’ve ever experienced something like that.  When they engage with you, connect with them.  Ask them questions to better understand what they’re specifically experiencing and if you and your offer could help them. Again, be a normal human without an agenda.  Be of service.  Ask good questions. Listen.  Get to know them. Get to understand what they’re going through. And after you’ve done that, decide whether or not you can help them. If you know you can help them, share that with them as you would want someone to share it with you.

One Last Note!

Selling starts by building relationships. Just like we wouldn’t propose marriage without getting to know someone first, the same is true with selling.  Start by building relationships and providing value. And remember, when you approach selling as serving and solving problems, it no longer feels sleazy.  So you can feel confident to share your work and finally build your business in a way that feels genuine and ethical, and is just so much more fun.

If you’re in the beginning stages of building your business and you want help getting clear about your niche and who your ideal client is, I’ve got you.  I created a guide to help you identify exactly who your ideal client is, nail your aligned niche, and craft an ‘I help’ statement that clearly speaks to your ideal clients.  This guide will help you take the first impactful step in getting your business off the ground. Grab your free guide below!

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